Sometimes when I’m working out what goes wrong with a discussion, I’ve had trouble figuring out where things went wrong. Today this phrase came to my mind: Solution Focused Communication. This really got me thinking about how to have the most successful conversations*. What are things that get in the way of that? Here are some of the things that I recognize get in the way.
- Having to be right or validated by the other person
- Surface distractions – things that are similar to the subject at hand but discussing it does not get to the causal problem that need be resolved
- Emotions – one of the most difficult things to get around is to look at the problem from an analytical viewpoint that does not let feelings detract from the problem at hand
I’m not sure where this idea will lead, but I hope to improve my communication skills.
*Successful does not mean that I succeed in convincing the other person, rather at the conclusion both of us fee that we were able to learn and share our ideas. If this means that there are actions to be taken, those should be clear and agreed upon.
Update: I found this post in drafts in November 2017. It still seems like a great idea to me.